Sunday, November 8, 2015

Sensitive to Bullsh*t stories...

I was having a conversation with my darling sis and came to think about the amount of times most people settle for Bullsh*t stories like the one I'm about to tell. I guess sometimes it's just easier to believe a lie because it might be more reassuring than the truth; probably even make you feel good about yourself in a sick and twisted kind of way. Some people just enjoy being fed lies because they're just that much easier to swallow than the truth. I mean, what would you rather eat? A rock or a sweet?  A sweet, right? Yep. That's what I thought.But, if you're anything like me and you've heard your fair share of Bulls*it stories, you start developing a sensitivity towards them. Do you mind explaining, you say? Sure thing. What I mean is, you start being able to call someone out on their bullshit when they're right in the middle of it. In which case you can a) continue to be naive and nod in agreement or b) put them in check. 
The Classic ..It's not you- it's me statement

As a University student who didn't know any better about relationships or reciprocal feelings, I made the mistake of believing a guy I'd just told I liked when he told me, "I'm kind of just trying to focus on Uni right now. But I think you're great, honestly", or something along those lines at least. 

Why wouldn't I have believed him? He had said he thought I was great, hadn''t he? Along with too many other things which served as an excuse for why he couldn't date me. To top it all off, he actually said....wait for it.... Oh gee, here it comes.... "It's not you, it's me." #Bruh And to think that all I did was stand there as he served me lie after lie and think, Yeah, that must really be it. There's nothing wrong with me, he just needs time to focus on important stuff. Gosh, he's so hot for finding Uni important. 

How did I find out he had been bullshitting me? Well, about a month later, his relationship status on Facebook changed, and guess what it said.. In a relationship with..[ name missing]  Yes, I was furious. How could he possibly have lied to me etc? But I was unfamiliar with what it meant to genuinely like someone, to like someone to the point where nothing would stand in your way of being with them, which would obviously have been translated into him not caring about us getting in the way of his uni-work if there had been a me in the first place.
  
What guys don't understand is the fact that women are very similar to them. We like visually appealing things too, we lie just to avoid hurting someone's feelings too, and we don't always appreciate being called up at random hours just to be asked where we are. You dig? 

Some women actually like visually appealing men
We're not all emotions and sweet talk. Sometimes all we want is a good ol' view of a Morris Chestnut look-alike or [insert name here] for that matter.  The same goes for if some women who want something. If they really want something, they'll turn into a go-getter, and almost nothing can stand in their way (not even marriage,sadly)! That means that if a woman/man tells you that the reason she/he isn't "ready" to date you is because they "just got out of a four year long relationship" -- regardless of how badly it ended -- just know that chances are, they're bullshitting you! I know plenty of people who never let a four year long relationship hinder them from jumping right into the next one after it ended. Not that that's an entirely good idea, but you get my point. And, if a person is as awesome a student at university as they claim, then juggling a relationship at the same time should be no biggie! 

What was so awesome about the next chick that it took him only a month to get with her, anyway? Kryptonite?  Despite the fact that he had millions of other things he needed to get to right away? What, I'm supposed to have believed that he'd suddenly changed his mind and that she had come along right about the same time as his "epiphany"?  This girl will not be fooled twice.



I'm so thankful I learned the hard way. How else would I be able to tell the difference between realness and "fakery"? If someone isn't willing to, at some point, move mountains for you, then they're not worth your time -- sorry to say.  As the saying goes, "Don't make someone your priority, when you're not even an option to them." 

So, the next time someone tries bullshitting you, you're conversation should go a little something like this...

 *Start sniffing the air in disgust* 
You: Oh my gosh. Do you smell that? Something in here really stinks!

Person: Really? No, what is it? 

You: Your Bullshit!  *Proudly walks off* 

Okay, maybe not. But say it like it is the next time you're confronted with bull crap. Why lie just so someone can feel good? What if they find out? Isn't that just humiliating? It would make them feel a lot worse about themselves, and would you feel good knowing you're the cause? 

And guys....Don't think you're doing a girl a favour by lying to her about how you really feel. In the long run you're just creating deeper scars that will take more effort to clean and heal.  Say it like it is. No more bullshit!