Monday, July 13, 2015

Everyone else is getting married (or having kids) -- should you?

There's no doubt that reaching the middle of one's twenties, or even the end (at which point people seem to pinpoint that time is running out), puts a great amount of pressure on an individual to settle down. Especially females with ovaries.  Each month on Facebook only brings about a news feed with yet another person on the friend-list engaged. You look at your feed and some are happily taking selfies with their children and you're either still single or still in that good ol' relationship of yours.

Some of us see marriage as an end goal; something to be achieved and something that pretty much settles everything, a missing piece to our puzzle if you will. I'll take it for some women here. If you're engaged at a time where most people are still single, or waiting for their partner to propose, you become the source of most women's envy. Now, if you're still single going on thirty, you will most likely be the subject of every conversation centring marriage non-stop. At parties, social gatherings, christenings, weddings, you name it. The same questions always seem to pop out of nowhere, even when there's no discussion about marriage whatsoever. "So, when will you be getting married?", "Have you found that special someone yet?" or, my all-time favourite.....Wait for it.....wait for it....  "You know know your biological clock is ticking, right?" Really???? 

The older one gets, the more frustrating it becomes to hear the same questions over and over again. As a person in a relationship you have no control over when your significant other plans to propose, although you may have had discussions about marriage a billion times just to make sure you're both on the same page about wanting to get married in the future. How do people expect you to be some type of psychic by asking questions like, "When are you getting married?" Get real for a minute, please!!!

It's extremely hard to be around so many happily married people all the time and constantly wondering when yours truly will appear, or when you'll be asked to get married -- especially when... Even Bola wey no fine sef don' engage (those who've heard the song will understand the reference). However, just because everyone else is getting married doesn't mean you should rush into marriage too. Because it's a one time life decision it should be thought through severely. What's the benefit of being single and just befriending guys? You get to see people's qualities and make up your mind about what you want in a man and what you don't want. What's the benefit of being in a relationship and not yet being married? You have enough time to plan out your future together. So, while everyone else is rushing to the alter in their sneakers, or looking seemingly happy in their marriages, just take your time. When it's right, it's right and you will know it. The memes used in this post aren't meant to offend anyone. Just for laughs.

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