Friday, September 27, 2013

An author at heart

As I no longer wonder where my future is going, or what to do with my life, there are other things I need to put into perspective, and work on. One of them, and the biggest dream I had since childhood, never mind singing, is my passion for writing novels and short-stories.

I've been writing since the day I scribbled my first 'A' in a notebook I had received from my first day at primary school. Somehow just staring at that wonderful piece of artwork made me instantly fall in love with the idea of one day holding a book written by me, which would hopefully be placed on shelves in book stores all around the globe.

I knew from typing my first words into an old typewriter and reading countless books taking me to endless places in the world - even when I was just sitting in a chair in my parents' living room - that I wanted to become an author when I grew up. Is that dream alive? Yes. Have I been working on any new projects? Loads. Have I published any books? Not yet, but the dream is pretty much still alive, and with all my might I hope to make it a reality.

My parents would often frown when I told them about my dreams of becoming an author. To many parents it's very important that their child is not only faring well in life, but also stacking up on paper (money). To them, becoming an author just wasn't a good enough ambition. How did I know people would like my work? How was I confident that my books would sell at all? Were questions they would ask me, and, of course, my only comfort and answer to those questions would be that I loved the material I wrote. I kept myself hooked on my own stories, engaged in every single sentence. I loved writing, and, more so, loved reading what I'd written just like I would read out of the pages of a printed book.

I continued to work on book projects of course, but they were just too many. Each day I would come up with another 'great idea' that I wished to work on, and after writing a couple of 30 something pages I would just put it to rest and not look back at it, until, of course I decided I wanted to "write again!"

My friends believed in me, and so did the people who had ever read any of my stories - the ones I was really passionate about that is, as the ones I wasn't so passionate about  hardly ever turned out to be any good - I just never believed enough in myself.

I chose to listen to the fact that an author would "never be paid well", would "never get enough recognition" etc. Of course I would encourage others to keep their dreams alive, and work on their dreams, but what about mine? They were slowly fading into the background of everything else in my hectic life (which, really, wasn't so hectic if one considers the amount of time I used to spend doing nothing. Perhaps just staring at a wall, dreaming; dreaming about the future and what could be).

The truth was, and still remains, that I just didn't realise that the key in my hand was meant for unlocking doors. It's sad when someone has a passion and talent for something and they just let it die, or they die before they ever do anything about it.

I decided I didn't want to die before I did something about my dreams, my ambitions. I would work to my very last sweat to make sure that at least one of my dreams came true. In the end, whether a dream of yours comes true or not, is really down to you. You can sit around and be miserable, or you can take advantage of every single source you have and know of.

Having a talent is so much, because not everyone possesses your talent, or, let's say, your passion for something - whatever it may be. A lot of people have talents, but only those who are truly driven by their will to succeed actually make themselves heard, make themselves known etc.

I wonder why people who are in top businesses - who aren't really considered to be people in possession of talent - are up there in the first place. I think one of the answers to that would be 'their drive and hunger for success'.

Neither time, space, nor people, should limit you in chasing your dreams, realising your passions and pursuing them. Remember, in your hand is a key, and that key is meant for a door. Use it instead of standing outside, waiting for someone to open the door. The house is yours, unless you open the door, nobody is home to open it for you.   These are the words I told myself today, and I very well plan on listening to them from now on.