Thursday, March 14, 2013

Bulimia??? - What seriousness lies behind spreading untrue rumours about someone?

I have been absent from my blog for quite sometime now, and those who read my blog on a frequent basis might find that very odd (apart from the fact that I usually take really long breaks at a time in between my posts) - however, this is not one of my 'intentional' hiatuses. I have finally decided to talk about what has kept me away for so long.

I'll start from the beginning.  Whilst growing up I was quite a skinny girl; I was never chubby or "overweight," as some might put it. No matter how much my family tried 'fattening' me up with all types of foods and candies, I remained pretty much the same 'stick thin' person. The problem was not that I was not eating, it was solely the fact that I had a body which seemed to break down food "faster than lightening". Where all that food went, nobody could comprehend.

It so happened that when I started University, all the stress that was brought with it (assignment hand-ins, exams)  would cause me to lose ridiculous amounts of weight, and of course that never looked good with my already slim stature, and this would also worry my mother.

The reason behind my losing all the weight was often due to worrying too much about assignments, which did not even need me to worry as much. At times I would fail to eat the normal four times a day, and eat only two times. Sweating during some nights really did not help much either.

My constant worrying about assignments while I was struggling to finish them in time for deadlines would distract me from the essentials, such as eating healthily etc.  Those who have known me for years, know that I have always been quite slim, no matter what I did, or how much I ate. I would occasionally gain weight, but it was never much.

I did not think that my weight had become a topic until the middle of this year.  A rumour (which continues to baffle me, and which had been spreading like wildfire beyond the four walls of 'the house I am living in'!!!) had it that I was suffering from bulimia, and that I had been heard making myself sick during the late hours of the night, so that nobody would hear me (although that does not make much sense to me). Funny enough, nobody in the house, except the person who was stating these things, had heard anyone being sick in the night. It's quite clever how this person had made everyone believe they had though - or start questioning, or trying to put pieces together. Furthermore, the rumour mill  claimed that the reason all the toilet paper was going down so quickly was because I was using it as a way to stuff the toilet??

When the rumour finally reached me, I had no choice but to confront the source, as I had never heard anything as ridiculous as that my entire life, let alone all the 5 years I have studied at Bournemouth University!!

I do not understand why it is that certain people delight in slandering others who have done absolutely nothing to them, except - in most cases - to be nice to them. Why this rumour had been lit, and why there was continuous pouring of oil on it, is completely beyond me. I would, nevertheless, like to talk about the seriousness in spreading rumours about others that are not true.

Some may look at slandering others as a harmless activity, but  it can in fact be the most damaging thing if at all it should reach the person being slandered. From a legal standpoint (yes, one can even receive punishment for slandering), a person is likely to be punished if the subject person who has been slandered can prove it to the court. Slandering/defamation is not something to take lightly. If people engage in gossiping about a person without confirmation of what they are saying, that is known as slander.  The fact that the people involved - however many they really are - were falsely stating that I am 'bulimic' could have lead to punishment if I had decided to take legal action.

In life, people have no idea who they are dealing with. You may look at 'harmless' talking as nothing, but, in the end, you could be dealing with a really determined person who would stop at nothing to see you punished. It is better to keep quiet than to speak bad of other people, no matter what they may or may not have done to you, especially if you cannot confirm the things you are saying. Slander may not only get you punished, but can completely ruin the life or image of another person.

I am writing this article to ask people to be careful in hurting other people's feelings, and to be careful with the things they say. If people involve themselves in slander, they would not be able to defend themselves if another person should bring up their name and say that they said this that and the other. However, if a person is careful to mind their own business, they will not get themselves into trouble, and nobody would be able to point their finger at them when everything comes down to everything.

Bulimia is no joke, and it is indeed a serious issue. If you know anyone who you think is suffering from it, or someone who is suffering from it,  it is better to pull them to the side and have a one to one talk with them rather than carelessly talking about it to other people. You would not be helping the person truly in need of it, but only make matters worse, and what would happen once they found out???? You might as well have blood on your hands if anything happens to them after that.To make matters worse, as I am not one to easily forget things, EVER! I did not even receive any apology for becoming a subject matter of such terrible lies.

The rumour about me really did upset me, because I just did not understand what I could have done for someone to say such things. I kept mostly to myself and rarely found myself minding anyone's business   It is for this exact reason that I choose to keep mostly to myself and have only a few friends, rather than tens and thousands of fake friends.  Just because people like you, does not mean you have to be a friend of everyone. No matter who you are, or how nice you are to people, there will always be someone who just hates you for no reason whatsoever.  Having said that, people disliking you should not stop you from shining.