Friday, August 24, 2012

Money

When I was younger, I was not like most children my age. I kept mostly to myself, and did not care much about money. I never understood its significance or the necessity of it, all I knew was that I did not care much about it. While some kids my age would press their parents for every last penny they had, I would be happy and ever grateful for a penny. It was never hard for my parents to make me happy, because I never really required anything of them, and if they had and they gave me, I would always be thankful for any amount.  That quality in me has not changed.

I never understood just how much of an insignificance I thought money to be until I started working. I would be quite careful with money, but at the same time I did not feel that I wanted it, I was only tied to it by the needs of human nature, the fact that without it I wouldn't be able to survive with things that required money. I found myself not knowing what to spend my money on each time a pay check came in, because I'd never really wanted much. People would find it quite odd that I did not know what to spend my money on, and if at all I were to spend money it would be on grocery shopping or a book.

I am disgusted by consumerism, and all the things we  think we 'need', when we truly just want, want, want, and when we don't 'need' it anymore, we simply just toss it out and then covet the next thing that catches our eye.

I taught myself to appreciate, because I learned that things did not come easy. Growing up I knew that even though my parents, as young as they were at the time, did not earn much, they always made sure I never lacked.  When I look back, I am quite glad I was not a child that gave them a hard time. I kept mostly to myself, and had to be forced to attend birthday parties, even though I'd rather sit at home and read a good book, or sleep for that matter.

I would rather love something and wear it a hundred times, than spend money on something I knew I would only wear once.

Money was spent on birthday presents, Christmas presents, school trips, activity days, and not once did my parents deny me of any of those things. Whenever they saw that I needed to purchase something for the sake of making my friends happy, or for the sake of taking part in the activities of other kids my age, they would make it happen. My parents were no magicians, but they were pretty darn good at making things happen, even when those things did not seem very possible.

When my mother bought new clothes for me, I would always wear them, always be happy, regardless of whether I favoured the clothes or not, but simply because she had thought of me.

The job I have has put so much into perspective for me, another thing which is known as growing up and coming of age in a mature way, the fact that money is quite useless and is only useful because you need it to buy even the necessities in the world. Because water costs money, I'm surprised the government hasn't started charging for the air we breathe as well.

Like zombies we overwork ourselves, hardly see our families, covet unnecessary things when the pay check arrives, and yet we are never happy. All we want is more, more, more - and for no reason at all.

Money is still useless to me because I never understood it, never understood why it was that everything was priced, that almost nothing could be done without money, and why people worshipped it so much when it was just paper.  It never filled me when looking at my pay-checks, it was rather the fact that I was working that made me happy, and not the pay check itself. I was working and did not sit at home sulking, that was my main happiness.

The society, no matter how people choose to look at it, is a controlled society - where consumerism eats at our minds, where working overtakes our daily life and where covetousness becomes a primary instinct. 'I have money, so I must spend'. Money is never there to look nice or to just be admired because of the amount, it is there to be spent, blown away - and unless there's a constant source, money disappears out of your hands and never returns.

Even though I'll never understand it, money has and will perhaps always be the thing that breaks up families or relationships, destroys the mindset, makes people turn evil or even crazy, causes greed, and is held at the very centre of people's lives, which without they cannot survive.

That thing we call Money..What's it to you?