Tuesday, December 6, 2011

Those times you wish you were more of a swift speaker...

Isn't it common to find one's self in a situation where all the nerves take over and make you stutter or say nothing at all when someone is accusing you of something - even if they're not wrongly accusing you - and you find you had a lot more to say when the person has actually turned their back and walked away, and then wonder why you didn't say it all? Especially when it's an embarrassing situation, like walking out of a toilet cubicle and having some other person who wishes to enter after you go "OMGOSH what did you do in here, set off a ticking bomb?" And all you can say in your defence is "Mphmmm" as you cringe at the stares of the other people present in the toilet.

What you really wish you would have said is perhaps "It wasn't me. Definitely must have been the person before me, and as there were no more available cubicles I had no choice but to use this one. - I was about to pee myself."

What about when someone is accusing of you having done something - although you know that every word they are saying is true, you wish to say something in your defence - and all you do is say a couple of unreasonable things which you cringe at the thought of once you scan through the argument in your head? - Especially when a set of pretty good lines appear after you've made a complete fool of yourself, and you think "Gosh, why didn't I just think of saying that?"

We've all been through a situation which makes us wish we were more of a swift speaker. That way we'd have good answers for every little thing that would come our way, including being embarrassed by an idiot in a public toilet, so the conversation would run a little something like this after you'd stepped out of the toilet cubicle.
Person going in after you: "OMG... what did you do in there, set off a bomb?"
You: Silence
Person who went in after you comes out of the toilet cubicle.
You: OMG... I knew it was you earlier!!! The smell is back, and it's ten times stronger than earlier!" Looking at the horrified expression of the person you nonchalantly turn on your heel and walk out of the toilet with a triumphant smile on your face.

Or a very familiar scenario of when a guy rejects you:

Guy: Listen. You're a really nice a girl and everything, but -'
You (cutting him off mid-sentence): Haha. Jeez. I don't like you either. I just said it to see how cocky a guy can get. Get over yourself! You're not all that!!!

Wouldn't it just be so awesome instead of the guy leaving you to hang with the 'you're-a-nice-girl we-can-be friends' bullshit?

Another random post, I know, but at least it's good to be back ^^