Monday, March 7, 2011

When you think all hope is lost...

There are those days that come around more often than not where you think there's absolutely no hope; don't want to move on from an ex because you feel you won't find anyone quite like them, or perhaps you just won't ever feel for anyone else the way you did about them, so you dwell on the hope that you will get back together, or that sooner or later they will realise that they have treated you wrong and apologise for it. 


Sometimes one is down in the slopes with too many worries and disappointments that they are quick to forget that it's not the end; then there are those things that make you realise that it is not actually over, that life is still continuing despite the fact that you feel time has stopped completely, the light at the end of the tunnel as some people refer to it. It could be something someone says, something which happens randomly or a person rendering you a smile on a certain day. 


There's the feeling of regret and hatred for yourself for ever giving in to defeat. But loving is certainly not defeat, is it? Perhaps caring so much for someone that you lose yourself, is. 


On those days when we're overwhelmed by feelings which cause our fragile hearts to bristle, when all we can feel is ice cold from the pain that doesn't seem to go away, when our eyes are sore from crying and the tears keep flowing, and we feel like we've out-cried ourselves, when we feel lonely, on those days we should remember all the things which have ever made us smile. 


Once I grew older I realised that I never regretted meeting anyone in my life in particular, because they all taught me something in their own way, whether from cruel intentions or from a kind heart. I learnt to be stronger, what kind of friendships I would want to form and the kinds I did not need, what type of guy I would eventually want to end up with and what guy I would not. 


Think about it; if you had never hurt in your life before, you certainly would not know how to handle it if it were ever to come to you during later years in your life. If you had never loved, you would never be able to appreciate it when someone loves you. If you had never sacrificed anything, you would never be able to understand it when someone sacrificed anything for you. 


Even though you are hurting and crying one day, perhaps a week, a month or a whole year, things keep changing, which means that you will eventually be happy again, and it will be like the hurt was never there in the first place. 


I can do nothing but be grateful for the times when I was able to genuinely laugh from the depth of my stomach, rather than be bitter when the same people who had made me laugh suddenly made me cry.


After crying comes laughter, so I guess instead of dwelling on the dark and sorrowful days, I'll just hang unto the good memories and hope that I can create better memories in the future. 


For those who are hurting, those who are down, those who are freezing, those who face doubt, those who are angry, those who are sad......there's hope.